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Survival Mode
May. 3rd, 2007 08:31 pmI have been in survival mode lately. I have been taking care of work and taking care of my body, but that is about it. I rest on weekends. I have not been doing anything particularly creative. I haven't written anything other than test questions and journal entries in quite a while. I haven't played my guitar more than once or twice in the last month.
I get tired! I am feeling too worn out to do anything but work and exercise. Maybe I should look into my diet. Maybe I am not eating enough of the right foods to give me energy.
My job is wearing away at my psyche, too. I pep myself up every day so I will believe what I am doing is worthwhile or having an impact. I don't know why that is important to me, but I need to feel like I have some purpose.
I have not been carpooling this week, which has me feeling much happier. I like saving gas, saving money, polluting less and all that good stuff, but I find the whole thing stressful. My car pool person is always running up to the last minute and I hate to rush in the morning. She picks me up late or I sit in her driveway waiting for her EVERY morning. I am really tired of it. She is never wrong, never apologizes. Not to mention she is very high-strung and complains all the time. Some things money can't buy, like my peace of mind!
Since I have not been carpooling, I got to work super early this week, and have felt so good about how the days went with more time to prepare for them. What I do is a performance. I perform and direct every day. I am about to quit carpooling. There are 3 other people who live here and commute, and they don't want to ride with her, either! I wonder if they would ride with me...
I get tired! I am feeling too worn out to do anything but work and exercise. Maybe I should look into my diet. Maybe I am not eating enough of the right foods to give me energy.
My job is wearing away at my psyche, too. I pep myself up every day so I will believe what I am doing is worthwhile or having an impact. I don't know why that is important to me, but I need to feel like I have some purpose.
I have not been carpooling this week, which has me feeling much happier. I like saving gas, saving money, polluting less and all that good stuff, but I find the whole thing stressful. My car pool person is always running up to the last minute and I hate to rush in the morning. She picks me up late or I sit in her driveway waiting for her EVERY morning. I am really tired of it. She is never wrong, never apologizes. Not to mention she is very high-strung and complains all the time. Some things money can't buy, like my peace of mind!
Since I have not been carpooling, I got to work super early this week, and have felt so good about how the days went with more time to prepare for them. What I do is a performance. I perform and direct every day. I am about to quit carpooling. There are 3 other people who live here and commute, and they don't want to ride with her, either! I wonder if they would ride with me...
